♥ Aimi Noor ♥

12|11|2017 A day before convocation, where dramas were everywhere. Living with more than 3 women in the house, you can smell estrogen at every single perimeter. PMS, mood swing - all girls stuff *wink*  Nonetheless, it's me, not them. :/ I cried silently for two days consecutively because I feel like I'm a burden to all. I even think to go to the ceremony alone, kah. Yelah, they ponteng sekolah for me [I know they like it even more  -____- ], my parents need to take leave, plan for the long journey to KL with the lots of anticipation of the ceremony since this is their first to experience. I myself couldn't stop thinking about how the day would be; the traffic, the crowd, the place [up till now, I never feel like the campus is my place. Idk, IIUMK di hati maybe].   So the night before, I talked to him. Pouring all tears the eyes couldn't bear any longer, soon the words that came out from his mouth soothed my bitter heart.  "all these untuk...

Bismillah sebagai pembuka bicara seorang mahasiswi yang baru dikurniakan segulung ijazah yang berharga lebih daripada ribuan tangisan di malam-malam kuiz dan examnya, yang lebih mahal daripada expenses hujung minggunya selama 4 tahun, yang lebih bermakna daripada tidur malamnya yang dikorban demi complete submission yang tak mudah melepasi tahap OCD nya. Alhamdulillah, sujud syukur kepada Ilahi yang mengizinkan aku melepasi fasa ini dengan aman. Terima kasih buat ibu bapaku yang sentiasa positif, sentiasa ada. Terima kasih buat adik-adik dan ahli keluarga yang sentiasa menyokong. Big thanks to the lecturers, for the knowledge, time and patience for my foolishness being reduced day by day in pharmacy school. Hats off to RX12, we finally did it. The days before my convocation are spent with disappointment and a deep feeling of nothingness. I repeatedly monologing "Di sebalik jubah ni ada anak yang sering menyusahkan".  Before I went through with stories, let me cle...

I appreciate how Allah puts me in this hurdles where I pricked my own self with needles of disappointment, I hung the egos in trees of anger, I cried a rainfall in the nights that I couldn’t sleep thinking about how rude I was, I pledged to myself not to be like how I used to be but I broke my own rules. He tests me with the unsettling feeling over and over due to the failure of change. It wasn’t easy.  As I look back, I’ve been walking away quite further from the old me.  Do I deserve a recognition? No.  Do I need appreciation? No.  Do I have to let go of everything? Depends.  Do I have to be grateful? Absolutely.  This life is the place to grow into a better person every day.